Suicides Or Murders? Complicated Issues of Relationships In Pakistan

I was thinking to write but I had no topic because life has nothing special for me nowadays. Today while I was walking as usual then I thought about issues and problems of relationships in Pakistan especially in my area and around. Here I gonna tell you about three shocking stories which I can confirm myself.

First and most recent is about a guy around 25 years old who shot himself few days ago. Why he committed suicide? No big reason. His parents wanted him to marry his cousin but he didn’t like that arrange marriage. His father belonged to my village so they buried his dead body in the village.

I think couple of months ago a girl shot herself in her school right in front of hundreds of other students. She had a sentence written on her arm that she was sorry for her act but she was sick of a guy. Also she wrote her name. Here you can find full news Video of girl’s dead body and news .

Few months ago one of my friends told me about a couple who married. That was a love marriage. Girl’s family wasn’t happy and agreed for that. So first couple left the village and after months when they came home then girl’s father and cousin shot the couple.

Pakistan is a dangerous place for relationships and love marriages. It’s a male dominated society but even males can’t decide about their brides.

Those things and issues forced me to try online dating to avoid an arrange marriage. Love is really hard or nearly impossible to find here. But fortunately urban areas have some liberal values for that thing but still trust is a huge problem and only higher class can enjoy freedom of love marriage. You can’t trust anyone. People lie and they are best at this.


39 thoughts on “Suicides Or Murders? Complicated Issues of Relationships In Pakistan

  1. Nafees, this breaks my heart. I’m sorry that you are surrounded by such a hostile environment for relationships and love. Insha’Allah, you will find a better place, perhaps in the city as you say, and that you will find love and be safe with that choice. I hope you have a loving family, though you must because you are a loving soul. Barakalahu fik…

  2. I think traditions are fine as long as they don’t make people unhappy or result in deaths. I feel so sorry for the young man who shot himself… 25.. he had the whole word in front of him. Hope over the years things change for the better. In Pakistan, India and all those other countries in the world that practice forced arranged marriages.

  3. Someone taking their own life is the most tragic loss of all…I believe everyone in the world should have the freedom to choose their own destiny but one would hope that they would be happy and comfortable enough to continue living in a friendlier world than to lose hope…

    • Lisat, thank you very much for your words. Yeah thats true that everyone should has freedom of thoughts and actions without harming others but it sucks here.

  4. Nafees its real cool to hear your perspective on Pakistani society. You have a lot of interesting observations about the society that you live in to share with those in the west. Do your own parents want to arrange a marriage for you? Do you think most arranged marriages unhappy or just some? Many love marriages in the west are unhappy as well unfortunately. Take care and blessings

    • Dear Pua, thank you very much for appreciation. Thanks God that I dont have any pressure from my father for my wedding. But still I couldnt find other independent side. Love marriages fail, its a mater but I dunno if somebody can justify arrange marriages. After all paper work both persons meet and start living together. A divorced person lost its worth so no stepping back even you dont your spouse. Thanks

  5. It is always heartbreaking to hear of young people so sad and miserable. Is there any way the elders of your village can get together and change the rules for dating in your village? This is a law that should be repealed. I don’t understand why the leadership wants everyone t be unhappy/

  6. That’s so sad. It used to be the same here years back, probably during my parents or grandparents time. But times have changed and people started to conform to the “western” ideals.

    It might still be like this in your village, but, will the newer generation still follow the elders’ footsteps and rules/laws when it is their turn to be elders? Meaning, when you and those who are around your age have become the elders of the village, will all of you still do the same or change the rules with an understanding? If a few can change, the rest will follow if they have the same thinking/mindset.

    Be strong. You’ll never know what will come by in the future. 🙂

    • aw thanks a lot for such a long and detailed comment. I really appreciate your concern and soft corner for people like me. You’re so kind.

      No one from new genreation wanna follow those strict and unnatural rules but they are bounded. They arent independent. You know its a new culture. Life is so different. Many girls run away from their homes for ther love marriages but after that they arent allowed to come back homes. If they come family wont accept them or they would kill them in the name of honor. Shit. My foot. Thanks again.

  7. I had put your blog on my different awards, not sure if you knew I appreciate the time you take to write your movie reviews! Thanks for liking mine, too! Take care!

  8. Hey my little brother! First and foremost your Big Sis is giving you a huge hug!! 🙂
    This is terribly sad but a reality. Those of us that live in the Western World are very lucky and at times we winge about this and that and forget about the freedom of choices that we have. I feel sad that not everyone gets to make these choices and even sadder for me knowing how unhappy this makes you. Look after you, little brother!! Hugs Big Sis xxxxxxxoooooo

  9. Good post. The first step to make changes is to make people aware of the situation and to discuss problems. All my best wishes for real, love relationaships. There should be nothing else.

  10. The story is truly heart breaking. And, it’s not just Pakistan. The suicide rate has been rising more than ever.

    Personally, I tried online dating in the past and somehow always end up deleting the profile. These past few months I am trying to get back to it, but still don’t feel ready for jumping into a serious relationship.

    Anyway, I am not a blogger BLOOGER. I’ve been looking around WordPress lately and found some interesting posts, including yours, that kept my interests here. Who knows–maybe I will start blogging.

    It’s nice reading your blog!

    • yeah thats right. Many cases I come to know about daily, they hurt. A better reader becomes a better blogger so I believe you’d be a great writer. Dont under estimate you.

      Online dating hurt me too. But still its a better option to find a better match so I wont give up. Still finding, maybe shes somewhere near, waiting. Thanks a lot for reading. Keep reading and I’ll keep writing. You dont have a blog?

      • No, Nafees. I’ve just been journaling online for the past 3-4 months, and it’s been therapeutic… to an extent. Depends on the person, I guess. Some love going pubic, others in hiding, still others on forums, etc. I believe WordPress can fulfill most of these needs, and one can get connected to persons more of his/her niche. Still not sure where all of this will lead to, but I’d love to spend some time reading these nice posts here first. 😉

        I love your pictures. I love nature.

      • Lol, no Nafees. It’s a private online journal. It has beautiful stuff in it, some bitching, some terror, etc. hahha 😉

      • ha ha its that much private that no else could read it? 😀 Thanks a lot for reading my blog 🙂 its so nice to meet you. Thanks WordPress.

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